9 February 2014
Dear Phyllis,
Several years ago a Korean girl was staying at Abba House, just down the street from my house. Every morning she would go for a morning walk and come down past my place. As we chatted, I invited her to come up to sit on my balcony. For the next several day we enjoyed very good fellowship as I shared with her exciting missionary stories. But then one morning I got in a negative mood, and told her the other side of the picture about times when everything went sideways. That morning she left with a heavy heart, and I never saw her again. I often wondered, did I make a mistake in discouraging her. But that is life. The Apostle talks about always always triumphing in Christ (2 Cor 2:14), but at the end of his life, he speaks how all had left him, and the picture was very dark at the end (2 Tim 4:16).
Last week I had the great joy of seeing Sheldon and Ellen Graber again. They just don't come any better than Sheldon an Ellen. They are the finest Christians America produces. They are of the old school of what America was 50 years ago. They are the finest example of what you wish every Christians out of heaven was like. They are not the multi-gifted with 5 talents, but the average American believer with only 1 talent. But the didn't hid it. They invested everything the Lord entrusted to them and made it as profitable as is possible (Mt. 25:14-27). Their son Chad and his wife Jenny are one of the finest missionary couples I know working in China. After passing midlife, Sheldon and Ellen packed up, and came to Thailand to be in charge of the Mennonite Chara Nanny program. The Mennonites had one of the finest programs going in Thailand where outstanding young ladies would come to Thailand to care for abandoned babies for a year or two until they could be sent on to adoption families. I have always said these young girls were the bravest girls I had ever seen. I can't imagine how they ever did it. They would leave everything behind in America to come here and take an infant to be their mother for two years. You can't get a child more deeply in your heart than these girls who were mommy to these little ones. And then the day would come when they would hand over their child to another woman, and never see their little one again. It was as gut-wrenching ministry as I ever saw. And yet a number of these outstanding Christian girls paid the price of having their heart ripped out to provide love for babies that had no other hope. Sheldon and Ellen came out to be mom and dad to the girls and be responsible for this heroic ministry. It was my great privilege to be close friend with them.
And yet the day came when unimaginable disaster struck. A baby came down with convulsions that they took to the hospital. The diagnosis was shaken-baby syndrome. Someone, in a rage, had shaken the baby so hard it had serious brain damage. Sheldon adamantly said that was impossible. It had to be some other cause. But it became a serious police investigation. Right at the height of this serious incident, one girl called Sheldon early in the morning to report her baby had died of SID (crib-death) that night. Sheldon rushed over and took the baby to the hospital in the bed exactly as she had found him. The chief of police had been out on a drug-bust the night before, and came in to receive the report that the ministry that was under investigation for the shaken-baby incident had just brought in another baby dead. Case closed. Obviously this Christian ministry were vicious baby killers. It was impossible to legally prove which girl was the guilty one, but at a minimum they could hold the director of that ministry responsible for irresponsibility. There was the serious possibility Sheldon could go to prison, and to avoid prosecution, the Grabers had to leave Thailand. The babies were taken away, and that was the end of the Chara Ministry.
That is the greatest mystery I have ever seen. It had been three years since last I saw Sheldon and Ellen. They are only here for two weeks to see Chad and Jenny who are down from China for a brief ministry in Chiang Mai. Oh my goodness it was wonderful to see them again. But the wounds have never healed. Though, as an observer, I shared the pain with them, I couldn't begin to place myself in their shoes, who had to bear the brunt of that disaster. They told me, as heart rending as the experience was for them, for the next year or two they shuttled back and forth from their home in Indiana to Pennsylvanian to support some of the girls who had gone through that horrible nightmare without the loving care of the home church that Sheldon and Ellen enjoyed. How could it happen? How is it possible that Jesus would allow such an unimaginable disaster strike one of the finest ministries going? Where was the answer to prayer? Those are questions we all are dealing with. It would seem that there will be no answer until we stand before Jesus in eternity, and He will explain the purpose for it. No doubt He will have a good reason, and we will thank Him in that day. But until that moment, we are left to keep our hands off this mystery, and quietly leave it with the Lord.
On a more positive note, Paul came over the other morning out of his mind. He had turned his computer on and the most vile, filthy, things that exceeds human imagination came on. There was only one possible explanation – someone had been looking at filth on that computer. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure who the leading suspect was. As Paul described the horrible scenario he was up against, I tried in vain to think of something positive to say to him. The only thing I knew was that I had a strong compulsion to pray. As Paul and I began to pour our hearts out before the Lord all I could do was to say, “Lord this exceeds my imagination for salvation.” This was so far out of my reach that my mind would not go in gear to imagine any positive resolution. The only acceptable solution I could come up with was death to the perpetrator. And that was not a good idea. Ironically, when we finished praying, Paul thanked me and said for the first time he had a measure of peace. The next day he confronted Marisa's son and told him that he was fortunate that he hadn't seen him the day before because he could not guarantee that he wouldn't have killed him. But that day he had slightly more emotional control. As Paul unloaded on him, the poor lad looked frightened but otherwise speechless. Then Marisa began to sail into him. Of course, one major difference was that Paul's rant was in English, and Marisa spoke Thai to her son. But the effect was astounding. He wound up crying profusely and writhing on the floor pleading, “I'm sorry! I'm sorry!” The confession and repentance was amazing. He frankly confessed to an addiction to porno and pleaded for deliverance. The day before I couldn't imagine salvation, but that day it appeared the Lord had indeed worked deliverance in his heart.
That night Pammy asked me, “How do you reconcile the incident three weeks ago with the angel appearing at Macro telling him and his mother that he was born-again and a good boy?” I hadn't put those two things together, but after Pammy mentioned it to me, the whole thing made sense. I see the angelic visit as an off-set to encourage the boy and everyone else that basically he is a good boy that has had a bad failure; but the Lord has, and will keep, his hand on him.
That incident was surprising, but Paul said the most amazing thing happened shortly after that when he was reading a book. Suddenly the Holy Spirit filled his heart with love for the lad like he had never known. What looked like a hole so deep there was no way out, has turned out to be a tunnel with sunshine at the far end.
It is true that young people (everyone) are exposed to filthiness the likes of which the world has never seen. In the days of Rome, society had developed an insatiable craving for violence and blood. It was reported that one day Nero provided for the death of 5,000 animals and humans in the Colosseum, and the crowd screamed for more. We haven't hit that yet, but even in the days of Nero society didn't have access to vileness at their finger tips like we do today. One wonders how things could get any worse. If we ever needed a present savior to deliver us and keep us in His grace it is now. A cold, or cooling, heart for Jesus is almost a guaranteed ticket to the lake. As Paul and I were praying, in my mind the thing that Paul saw on that computer was so wretched that it seemed as if God had flung it into the pit of hell, hell itself would reject it as too filth to be put there, and you would have to apologize to the devil for sending send dirty stuff to his pit. The only acceptable place I could think of was to fling it into the lake of fire. And, at that, we must thank the Lord that He has made such a place for unthinkable xxxxx things.
A few weeks ago I met some Independent Baptist brethren who invited me to their church. That is my background, and I know exactly who they are. The pastor invited me to have lunch with him a week ago and I promised him that we would visit them today. Pastor Kichikun was not happy that we went church shopping, but I had promised Dr. Jack that we would come. We did. I don't know. Thirty years ago I would have been thrilled to attend such a meeting. It was highly American. More than that, it was 1950 American. There was nothing of present day modern Christianity in it. Pammy loved it. Nearly all the American men had Thai wives and Pammy hit it off big time with Dr. Jack's wife and several other women. She loved signing the traditional English hymns. At this point she is more independent Baptist than I am. Dr. Jack is very desirous to have us be members there and asked me to be his official greeter.
The biggest objection I have, is that it is focused on Americans, and my heart is more into reaching Thais for Jesus. Two years ago I made a commitment to be faithful to Kichikun, and in spite of the strain that seems to have come up in recent months, I am reluctant to back off my commitment to him. I am willing to pray over both options, but at the moment the Lord would have to show me a little stronger that that is where He would have me attend.
The biggest blessing I got out of the service this morning was that I found myself unexpectedly sitting beside a pastor from Pakistan. When he told me where he was from my heart soared. I told him how I had been there four years ago, and my unsuccessful attempt to get back there three years ago. He said if I would try again he would sponsor me for a visa and security. I asked about the situation inside Pakistan today, and he replied it varied from area to area. The northwestern area is controlled by the tribal war lords and the Taliban. Karachi is dangerous. But he said in his area of Punjab it is very peaceful and secure. He said they were doing a great deal of open air evangelism. When I asked him how many they were seeing saved each year, he replied last year he had seen 500 come to Christ. That is what I would expect for Pakistan. He made a very strong appeal for me to come help him in Pakistan.
When I spoke with Sheldon and Ellen Graber, they asked me what I planned to for the future. My reply was, “I have no idea.” A year ago I was on my way to west China to work with the Ughurs in Xinjiang. They still are very much on my heart. But I am now a married man localized in Chiang Mai. I teach 30 minutes every morning at the kindergarten, and Singha is the biggest blessing I have going at the moment. I am working every day at Gary's teaching Lisu men how to do cabinet making. Paul is a major blessing. Dr. Jack would like me to work with him, and now I have an invitation to go to Pakistan again. Thank God I can honestly say I really don't care. The Lord has a spotless blank sheet of paper that He can write anything He wants to on it. The only personal request I have is that I would be grateful if Jesus could use me somewhere to advance the cause of His Kingdom. But that is tomorrows problem.
Resting in our wonderful Lord Jesus,
bill
No comments:
Post a Comment