13 April 2014
Dear Phyllis,
Today is Song Kron. That is the number one holiday in Thailand. This is the Thai equivalent of the American Christmas holiday, except it is a huge national water fight that goes on for three or four days. It is virtually impossible to move more than 100 meters without getting doused with a bucket of water in the face. Riding a motor bike is extremely dangerous, and the accident rate soars. Along with all the stores being closed, everybody goes home for the holiday. That means empty churches.
Last week Kichikun told me that I was up to speak this week, but warned that the number would be way down. Being somewhat of a blank Sunday I wasn't too motivated to come up with some earth moving message, and my mind went to the barrel. The barrel message that the Lord laid on my heart was an old classic that I had preached 50 years ago to the missionary community in Karuizawa – “An afternoon with the buzzards”
The text is from Genesis 15. In the preceding chapter, we read about the incident where there had been a local war with area “kings” and Abraham's nephew Lot had been taken captive. In a rash moment, Abraham armed his servants and dove into the fray to rescue his nephew. On his way back, he met Melchisedec and the king of Sodom. The encounter with Melchior is the one mentioned in detail in Hebrews 7, where Melchisedec blessed Abraham and Abraham gave tithes to Melchisedec. The king of Sodom said, to Abraham, “You take the goods and just give me the persons”. And Abraham replied, “I won't take a shoe latch from you lest you say 'I have made Abraham rich'” (Gen. 14:21, 23). Good word! It is a pity that more people don't have that same attitude today.
It would seem that Abraham had two things on his mind when he went to bed that night. First, he reflected on what had just happened, and was concerned that he had embroiled himself in local warfare. That was the last thing he wanted. But there was a good chance he had gotten engaged in local disputes that could involve a great deal of fighting in the future. Secondly, he was having second thoughts about all the booty he had given back to the king of Sodom. He didn't have to. Those goods were legally his.
In the middle of the night he came out of his sleep with the awareness that the Lord was speaking to him. The first thing the Lord said to him was, “Fear not, Abraham, I am thy shield, and thy exceeding great reward” (Gen. 15:1). That settled the two things that were on Abraham's mind.
But then the old issue of a son came up. Abraham protested that the Lord had not given him the son as promised. At this the Lord said to Abraham, “Come outside a minute and look up”. It was a beautiful clear nigh and the sky was filled with millions of stars. The Lord said, “This is what the number of your descendants is going to be like.' Abraham believed God and it was counted to him as righteousness. Then the Lord gave him specific instructions about how to make an offering.
A few hours later, when Sarah got, up she asked Eliezer if he had seen Abraham that morning. Eliezer replied that the Lord seemed to be speaking to Abraham, and the last he saw him, Abraham was out in the flock getting a heifer, a nanny goat, a ram, and a couple of birds. As the sun came up that morning Abraham was standing beside his altar with the sacrifices neatly laid out, and his heart pounding expecting the next move was God's. He couldn't have been in a better situation. This wasn't just some religious experiment that he cooked up hoping that God would meet with him. What started off to be a bad night worrying about getting of involved in local warfare and all the loot he had given back to the king of Sodom, now had become a sacred moment where he was doing serious business with God at God's direction. But then, rather than the fire of God falling on his sacrifices, black spots began to appear on the horizon. Then they got more numerous and bigger. Buzzards. Buzzards came down on the altar to steal away this sacred thing Abraham had offered to God. He picked up a stick to drive then away. But then he got into a Mexican stand-off with the buzzards sitting in a tree ten meters away and Abraham standing by the altar protecting his offering with a stick. What a bad deal! Worse than this, in describing this scenario, the scriptures says, “the fouls came down upon the carcasses”. An offering is something sacred, but a carcass is just fly-covered, dead meat. What started out being a wonderful day wound up being afternoon with the buzzards.
As the sun was going down, Abraham was totally spent. A horror of great darkness came over him. But then when all was gone, the fire of God came down passing through that sacrifice ratifying God's covenant with Abraham.
The first year I was saved was wonderful. As I began to grow in the Lord, I read the testimonies of Charles Finney, DL Moody, and others who had had post-salvation experience that made them mighty men of God. I had a Pentecostal friend who spoke to me much about the baptism of the Holy Spirit, and I had a great hunger for more of God. I began to earnestly pray that the Lord would baptize me with the Holy Spirit, and make me to be one of those mighty men of God. I was stationed at Moody AFB in Valdosta, Ga. at that time, but used to drive home to my spiritual family, the Stadsklevs, in Marianna, Fla. every weekend. One Saturday night we had been to a meeting and came home about 9:30. Rather than going to bed, I decided to have it out with God, and get baptized with the Holy Ghost that night. I started out praying, walking along the field roads going out to Stadsklevs fields. But God wasn't listening. I thought, perhaps it might be more holy if I knelt to pray, and got down on my knees on the sandy soil. That didn't get God's attention. Finally, I was lying flat on my face pounding the sand with both fists as I was begging God to come down and fill me with the Holy Ghost. No response. I was virtually shouting, “Lord, come down and fill me!” Then I waited in the stillness for the Holy Ghost to come on me. Instead of the Holy Ghost I heard a buzzzzz. Mosquitoes were all over the place. Then I felt something crawling up my pants. I was lying on a fire ant hill. As I was pounding on the ground, I got sand in my face. Finally the fuse blew. In my desperate frustration I stood and said to God, “Is this what You call blessing? I came out here to get filled with the Holy Ghost, and all I have got is mosquitoes, fire ants and sand.”
That night was one of the darkest nights of my life. For the first time since I had been saved I went to bed without praying. I was mad at God. The next morning it was light outside but pitch black inside. I got dressed and went out to the barn to help Otto with the milking. Otto was the most godly man I knew. I called him my spiritual father. He discipled me and taught me the scripture on milk stools. There was no man on earth that I loved more dearly, but that morning I couldn't stand to be in his presence. I lied and said, “I think there is still one more cow in the barnyard”, and went out of the barn. Once out, I jumped over the barnyard fence, and took off down across the fields.
There was an apple tree where I frequently went to have devotions, but that morning I just wanted to die. I looked for a rattle snake to bite me, but couldn't find one. I watched the sun come up that morning, traverse across the sky, and set in the west.
I knew that the folks would be going to church that evening, and when they were gone, I would get in the house, get my things together, and leave forever. I was going to Japan in two weeks, and I knew if I could get out, they would never see me again. Waited until I heard the house door slam, the car start up, and leave. I started up towards the house, and then heard the kitchen door close again, and the Jeep start up. Otto started driving the Jeep through the fields calling, “Bill, Bill”. That broke my heart. I thought of Jesus and the 99 and 1 – and I was the lost I. But my heart was too hard. I wrote a note saying, “My sin has made me indescribably ugly, and I am going back. Goodbye, Bill” I drove down the dirt road three miles to the hard top, but I was crying so hard I could hardly see to steer. I desperately wanted to go back, but my heart to too hard. I desperately cried, “Lord, turn me around.” About that time, when I got to the hard top, the wheel was spinning in my hands, and I drove back to the house.
Otto had just got back from looking for me, and read the note. He prayed, “Lord, bring him back”. It was at that time the wheel was spinning in my hands at the hard top. When I pulled in the driveway, Otto came out, put his arm around me, and said, “Bill, let's go in the house and have some coffee”. As I sat at the kitchen table, Otto said to me, “Bill, I don't know much about theology, but I do know you are born-again of the Spirit of God, and you can't go back to that old life you used to live any more than you can breath water like a fish.” God met with me that night in the kitchden, and gave me what I needed to go to Japan to serve Him for the next five decades.
I was telling Paul this story the other night and he said, “That was the time the Lord baptized you with the Holy Spirit”. Suddenly I thought, “My goodness, you're right! That was the time I was baptized with the Holy Spirit.” It has been 56 years and this is the first time I have understood God's dealing with then on that subject. It was nothing like I expected. The power of God didn't fall on me making me a mighty spiritual giant. I didn't stand up to preach to thousands. On the contrary, the Lord took me all the way to the bottom. That was the most undone I have ever been in my life, and that was the time I cried the hardest of my life. Along with the Inverted Kingdom, I now understand that to be filled with the Holy Spirit it is necessary for the Lord first to make you totally empty.
Over the years, occasionally, some have refereed to me as a Spirit-filled believer. This is a tag that I have never owned as I have never spoken in tongues or had an ecstatic Spirit-filling experience. But I see now that the name-of-the-game is not to produce high-voltage, spiritual dynamos, but to make simple believers filled with Jesus who is meek and lowly of heart (Mt. 11:29).
Before I close, I want to share that last night we had the best meeting ever held in my home in 35 years. When my world collapsed in 1989 and 1990 I despaired that the day would ever come again, when there would be a Christ-filled meeting in my home. For 22 years I had no home to have one in. And the first two years of this marriage were a disaster. But last night the Lord did something I never hoped to see. I had invited Pastor Et and his wife over for pizza. There were some things on my heart that I very much wanted to share with him. I invited my Lisu partner, John, his brother-in-law, and a few others. The Lord put together the chemistry of several coming together that was much different than what I had in mind. Pammy was spectacular! My “Martha in the kitchen” was superb in putting together a meal that set the stage for the finest fellowship that I have seen in my house in 35 years. That was a dream come true that I never thought I would see again on this earth. We can invite people to our houses, and prepare food to eat, but only the Lord can provide the atmosphere and the presence of Christ. This is the main ingredient, and that is what we had last night.
Oh yes, I had a good time in church this morning talking about Abraham spending an afternoon with the buzzards. Oh my goodness God is good. Thank You Jesus.
bill
No comments:
Post a Comment