God's Will

21 January 2018

Dear Phyllis,

The Lord has only given me one fish at the moment. I am pouring my life into one man – Sangha. He is my chief joy. I spend nearly two hours with him every morning talking about the wonderful works of God. He has a hunger for spiritual things and the Word of God like I haven't seen in a long time. But last week I was clobbering him with everything short of the fence post. I told him there were three areas of life for him. One is his personal walk with the Lord. Secondly is his relationship with the Body of Christ. And the third is his ministry – his reaching out to unsaved. In the first area he is excellent. He loves the Word. He loves the Lord. He is very sensitive to the Holy Spirit. But he has zero church life. He is working on a doctoral degree for his kindergarten. This ties him up every Saturday and Sunday. It is impossible for him to go to church on Sunday. I told him he has not given his Sundays to Jesus.

He countered, “Bill, you don't understand, I have two lives. I have a life that I must live right now. I have a wife and a kindergarten. I have 25 teachers and 300 students to take care of. I have to make money and eat. Later I will go to heaven and be with Jesus, but right now I have earthly things to take care of.” I fired back, “You are dead wrong. You have only one life. Period! You have only one responsibility – to do the will of God. If God has given you a wife and a kindergarten to take care of, that is the will of God for you. But your single responsibility is to do the will of God. If God wants you to have a PHD then do it and get that degree. But if He doesn't, then quit it”. He has been working for three years to get that doctorate. He said there were 35 in his class when he started. Now they are down to 20. They all have to pass a dissertation – to present their research to a board of 10. Last year there were 20 who tried and only 4 passed. His turn is up in April. If he passes it he will have his PHD, but if he fails he has to go on for one more year. That could go on for one, two, or three more years. I told him I would trust the Lord for that. Jesus could easily give him that doctorate, but if that is not the will of God for him then I would quit it. I told him my experience with the Air Force.

When I joined the Air Force I desperately waned to be a fighter pilot. There were 65 of us in my class when I first joined. Eight of us finished together. That is not totally true as in the original class there were some who were going to be navigators. They could not pass the original pilot exam. There were some who went into multi-engine and went to different basses. And there were many who just flunked out. And some were killed. During the year and a half of pilot training it looked like no one would graduate.

The Lord blessed me and gave me to gift to do well. I can say that it was the Lord, because as I passed through various stages of training there were some things I just flat could not do. Then suddenly, the Lord would give me the gift and I would become outstanding. I had a few remarkable flights and had the reputation of being one of the top pilots in training. I had the highest flying scores in my class. After 17 months of elimination training I was down to one last test. I had to pass the 60-4 instrument flying test. I had done extremely well on the mid-term test and it was only a question of how high my grade would be on the final. There were some who had made it that far but couldn't pass the 60-4 and washed out. If I passed that, my goal was in hand. I would get my wings and commission as an Air Force officer. If I failed it, I was out of the program. The squadron commander was my test pilot to take the test. I did well on most of the requirement, but had to successfully make an ILS (Instrument Landing System) – to land the bird totally on instruments. As I lined up for the ILS suddenly, I had a total mental blank. That was the first time I ever had that experience. I didn't know a thing. I couldn't read a compass. After wandering around aimlessly the instructor said, “I'm sorry, Cook, but if you had been by yourself you would have been killed.” I was the first man in the class to fail a 60-4. That was the first time I ever had a failing flight. The rule was you were allowed one failure, but if you failed the second time, it was all over. They gave me a practice flight and I did well on that. Then a couple days later I tried again. This time I flew with an instructor I had never met. Things went reasonably, but for the ILS we went up to Little Rock, Arkansas. That was a strange field where I had never been. As we got to high key and stated the let down, suddenly another plane blew a tire on the runway closing the field. Planes were sent all over Arkansas. I was assigned to some odd ball radio fix I had never heard of. I found the frequency on my chart and headed for the fix, but when I got there I didn't know what to do. After flying around like a sun flower the instructor said, “I've got it. You're busted”. I failed my second 60-4. It's all over. I'm out of the program. The 20 minute flight back to our base was the longest flight of my life. I knew it was the last time I would be in an airplane. But I believed in miracles. As soon as we landed I was going to call every Christian in Greenville and ask them to pray for me. But I didn't know what to pray for. It looked like God had closed the door of flying for me. If it was not the will of God for me to be a pilot was I willing to wash dishes in the cadet mess hall? What a battle! There was a war in my heart. Finally, as we landed, I said, “I will call every Christian in Greenville, but rather than asking them to pray for a miracle that I get my wings I will ask them to pray that I can accept the will of God for my life – even if it means washing dishes.”

We hadn't been on the ground 30 minutes when I was called in the commander's office. He handed me a slip of paper and said, “Cook, sign this”. I thought, “Oh my goodness, they are putting me out of service already”. I looked at the form and saw it said, “60-4 satisfactory test”. I looked at the commander and asked, “Sir, what is this?”. He said, “ILS is not required on a 60-4 test”. He had found a loop-hole in the regulation and graded me on everything I did well and deleted the ILS that I failed. He said, “You passed your first test. Forget about today. That was just flying time”. I didn't earn my wings – God gave them to me.

This is a huge issue for Sanha. He has spent three years trying to get a PHD. To quit it at this point would be an enormous decision. But is this the will of God for his life? Oddly enough this concept of only one responsibility in life – to do the will of God – is new to Sanha. But in this he is not alone. I told him that I believe 95% of Christians believe that they have two lives – one that they live now and the future one in heaven. What they are saying is, “Lord Jesus, thank you for dying for me and giving me eternal life. But Lord Jesus, please wait for another 30 or 40 years. I will see You in heaven, but right now I have my own life to live and other responsibilities.” The number one concern in everybody's mind is what am I going to eat, drink, or wear? That is the most important issue in this life. But Jesus told us, “Don't worry about it. Seek first the Kingdom of God and the Lord will take care of our daily necessities (Lk. 12:29-31)”. Doing the will of God is everything. But that is the rub. We have our own life that we want to live. If the will of God is in a different direction, then there is a problem.

This was an enormous crisis for me. If the Lord did not want me in a cockpit, but it was His will that I be a dish washer, was I willing to do that? I didn't like it, but when I gave that to Jesus He gave me the best life possible. There have been many tests along the way since then. A lot of things have happened that I wish had gone the other way, but as for God, His way is perfect (Ps. 18:30). My life is behind me now. Nothing is a major crisis. Doing the will of God is the only thing I am interested in. But for Sanha, at this mid point of life, his future is hanging in the balance; and if the will of God for him is in a different direction than what he has his heart set on, that is a huge issue. I have no idea how he will do on his dissertation, but I would be surprised if he passes it. I suspect that would take a miracle. But God could do it.

It will be great to see Jesus in heaven, but it is almost better that we can walk with Him right now. Lord, help us to be Your followers.

                                                          bill