18 Oct 2020
Dear Phyllis,
I'm still here, but just barely. I am in the hospital. I had been in free fall for the past two week, and Friday I hit the jolly bottom and went through it. For the first time I hit the place where I could do nothing, Pammy and I had been talking about going to the hospital to have things checked, but when she said, “ Lets go”, I said. “No way, I can't do it today”. Four members from our Beulah Church were at our house most of the day. At 2:00 in the afternoon some gal came in to take my blood pressure. I asked, “Who is this?”. Pammy replied, “She is with the ambulance crew who have come to pick you up. The ambulance is waiting outside”. It took two men from the church and the ambulance driver to get me outside 20 feet where they had a wheel chair that extended to a stretcher. I had planned, if we went to the hospital I would have her get a wheel chair to wheel me into the hospital, but when we got there I realized the only way I could have gotten in was on a rolling table. The folk from the church were with us. We hadn't been there 30 minutes when Beverly, the missionary who started the church 30 years ago, told me, “Pammy had to go home to get some more tracts”. She always carries bags full, but now she ran out and had to go get some more.
The main things was to check my blood. By 4:00 I talked to a doctor who told me I had two problems. The blood test showed I had a lot of infection in my blood and there were quite a bit of cancer cells. “Thanks. I've known that for two years. What's new?”. He told me, “We have some very good anti-biopic therapy that can clean up the infection and maybe help the cancer blood cells, but you will have to stay here for 4-7 days”. “No way! I'm going home. I'll take outpatient, but I am not staying here over night. I'll see you in the morning”. I lost that argument. By 5:00 I was in a ward room. In retrospect, it had been a very good day. I had been as comfortable lying on a table in the hospital as I would have been at home. I knew I was in the right place, and the fellowship with the folks from the church had been excellent. Praise the Lord! I was right where He wanted me.
They immediately started a lot of IVs. I didn't like being in a ward room with a lot of old people but shikata ga nai” (nothing you can do about it). All the beds have high guard rails around them so the patients cannot get out. I told a nurse, “I'm going to need a bed pan”. She gave me one for the time when need arose. They have adult pampers for all patients. No thank you. At 2:00 AM a nurse came in to change pampers and give me a new one. “No way! I don't need one”. I had talked a nurse into letting down the guard rail on one side of my bed, but the night nurse got mad at me and put it back up. Great! Now I'm trapped in like a cat in a box that I can't get out of, and no bed pan. My only hope was to climb over the guard rail and look for my bed pan. Ten hours previous that would have been impossible. It was Herculean, but I was able to do it and, praise God, I found the bed pan. Man howdy, did that feel good. Just as I finished a nurse showed up who let the side rail down again. I crawled back in bed and suddenly realized what a miracle that had been. I was wet with sweat, but 10 hours previous that would have been unthinkable. Thursday I was convinced this was a one way down experience from which I would not recover. Now I will be surprised if I am not back on my feet soon.
Yesterday was a remarkable good day. I felt well enough to try to walk to the bathroom. It turned out that the bathroom was the other side of the globe. It was several time zones away. It was like walking from LA to Texas. The bathroom was at the end of a very long hall nearly 70 meters (170 feet) away. With Pammy's help I did get there, but had to sit down to rest half way back. But that was 15 times my best atheletic achievement the day before. I won't say I am 15 times better but I certainly am 3-5 times improved.
I really like this hospital. We can easily see why the Lord kept His hand on us to keep us from going to the one we intended. We planned on going to the top-of-the-line university hospital the other side of Chiang Mai. This is a brand new hospital only 5 km (3 miles) from our house. It is not a new one but a rebuild cheap government hospital that has only been opened 6 months. I am sure it is vastly cheaper and the closest one to our house.
Pammy has been the hero. The fact that I am here can be 98% attributed to her. Last night she was here until 9:00 PM before she went home. I feel like a pin cushion. Last night I had two IVs going, one in each hand and one more waiting to go. At 1:00 AM two nurses came in to pull the IVs. I had my eyes closed most of the time. But one nurse was exceptional. After she pulled the IV needles she rubbed my hand. Then she rubbed my arm, Then she rubbed my stomach, and finally wound up, laying across my body. I thought, “My goodness, I have never seen such an aggressive nurse”. I opened my eyes and was shocked to see it was Pammy. She had gone home but couldn't sleep, so she had come back to see me. After the needle brigade, I was finally able to fall deeply asleep. Some time around 6:00 AM or later a nurse came in to take my blood pressure. Pammy had been there all night and tried to wake me. I DID NOT want to wake up. I knew she was calling, but didn't want to answer. Then she said, “There are some very pretty Christmas lights in the states on You Tube”. I did not want to look at Christmas lights on You Tube, but the weirdest thing happened. I could see a map of the US all lit up with Christmas lights, but it was so bright and blinding that I couldn't sleep. I said, “I can see the lights. Please turn them off”. Pammy was panic struck. She was sure I was dead or dying and was frantically trying to wake the dead. I was awake enough to be empathetic. I knew what she was up against and could get inside her to feel what she was feeling. But I was dead- not literally - but dead tired and I didn't want to wake up. She stated crying. I could have cried too – not because I was dying, but because I wanted her to leave me alone. By then the argument over waking up had grown so intense I was awake enough for the nurse to check my blood pressure. Pammy is clinging to me like a burr on a coyote's tail.
Pammy is really a rare jewel. She is a girl that I didn't want and pleaded with Jesus to keep me from making a mistake and marrying her. I did it simply was an act of obedience that I felt it was the will of God. Our first few years could not have been worse. She did everything possible to be bad. I could have killed her for 1/5 the bad stunts she pulled. But I stayed with it because I thought it was the will of God. She has come around remarkably. The biggest thing that has changed is that I have quit trying to change her to be the kind of person that I think she should be, and just accept her the way God has made her. Spiritually she is one in a million. There may be a few in Russia or China but I doubt that there is another person in America like her.
Financially we are in the best shape we have ever been in. The cost of health care here is a fraction of what it is in the states. But the cost of a fraction of astronomic is still considerably outside our budget. If any one would care to help us cover this medical expense, the way to do it is to contact Wayne Thomas at – thomcat222@comporium.net. For a year or more Wayne has been helping us and has set up the best financial system I have heard of. Somehow he puts money in a bank in the states and it immediately shows up on our Bangkok Bank account in Chiang Mai. I cannot tell you what a life-saver Wayne has been. Any funds that would get to Wayne would be here immediately.
Last week I wrote you that I thought I was at the River. It looks like I was wrong. If things develop like they have in the past three days I am going to have to get a towel, dry my feet, put my cowboy boots back on, and keep following Jesus for a few more kilometers. At this point, and Trump wins the election to save America, it may be possible to get that cup of coffee that I have been looking for and we can share together the wonderful works of God. Thank you for your prayers. He may have answered them.
Your indebted brother in Christ,
bill
